I know this picture is all kinds of wrong, but it so fits how I feel when I get Twitter slimed.
You know the drill.  You get the email saying “First and Last Name is following you.” You get excited when you click on their profile because they look like a normal person, not the porno king or queen of the week. Until you get to their website, and it’s one big advertisement, telling you how different they are from other marketers, how you can trust them because they make …

This is so not fair.  
She never let’s me have any fun. 
Why couldn’t she stay over on myspace doing her teeny bopper thing?  
Why does she have to come over here and get all up in my business?
Kids just don’t understand.  
We parents need a place of our own.   
And I know she’s gonna be checking up on me and my friends.
Shoot- and I won’t be able to talk about her as much.
What’s a mother to do?

The word “diva” in Latin means “feminine divine” or “goddess”.    A woman of superior charms, great beauty, grace, and excellence.  A creator.  
The Italians coined the term “diva” to denote the female lead in an opera.  She is the BEST- a woman at the top of her game.  
And then the term was bastardized because of a few “temperamental” folks.
Diva came to mean: hard to please, bitchy, mean-spirited,erratic behavior, ego-maniacal, and over-indulgent.  Jennifer Lopez.  Oops.  I digress.  
I missed the memo that says you must become hell on wheels …

Last week, The Cooties ran amok in my home.  The Girl got it, The Man got it, and then I got it.  Monday was fine.  Business as usual, but by Tuesday, it was all over but the shouting (more like whining- like a toddler who is tired, but doesn’t want to take a nap, but can’t resist curling up in a blankie and whimpering about how not tired she is until she falls asleep- but I digress).  In my antihistamine/decongestant/cough suppressant haze, I thought it would be a good idea …

The older my mother gets, the more ”in” to gadgets she becomes.  She wants to be able to use all the cool stuff.  Except she needs extensive tutorials.  OK- not a problem.  I have a 13 year old that doesn’t read directions but instinctively knows how to use every feature on every gadget ever known to man.  Which is good for my mother because that means that Diva in Training (DIT from here on out) does all the groundwork for her.  Sort of like her very own Geek Squad.
It’s after the …

 
Call me cynical, but over the years, I’ve learned to distrust all politicians.  For me, voting is often choosing between the lesser of two evils.  I live in a state with some of the most RIDICULOUS politicians on the planet. White and Black.  Republican and Democrat.  They all make me crazy.
Each time I touch that screen, I hope and pray that the person I’ve chosen won’t screw things up worse than the one before him.  Not voting is not an option for me. I would never disgrace the memories of …

I watch exercise infomercials.
There, I’ve said it.  
The Firm (especially the one with the rocker thingy)
The Total Gym
The Bean
Bowflex Treadclimber
Slim in Six
Turbo Jam
Tony Horton’s 10 Minute Trainer and P90X (two of my favs)
Malibu Pilates
Winsor Pilates
Ab Rocker
You name it and I’ve seen it. Sunday mornings are the best time to catch these infomercials, in case you were wondering.  
I think they need a public service announcement at the end though:  
“In the time it took you to watch this infomercial, your ass could have been working out.”
Heading to do some …

I tried to think of another title for this post. I really did. Nothing else brought it home as well as: I. Hate. Ass-kissin’.
I especially hate ass-kissin’ in the professional realm.
I have a very low tolerance for disingenuous interactions. In my climb up the managerial ladder, I have seen many folks schmooze their boss (or boss’s boss ) in order to gain favor. Their interest in the other person is in a very “slimy” way. Not just because the person may be interesting or …